One of the hardest parts of falling in love is trying to figure out why someone loves you in the first place. There’s no rhyme or reason to feelings, but it’s easy to overthink them anyway.

Which is precisely what Mayama Haru does.

Adapted from Mashiroito’s manga After Changing Seats, It Seems the Guy Sitting Behind Me Likes Me, the Japanese BL After Moving Seats, the Boy Behind Me Has a Crush on Me stars Konishi Eito as Mayama Haru and Gennosuke as Asamiya Kosei. A simple classroom seat change puts the ordinary and somewhat insecure Mayama directly in front of the handsome and popular Asamiya. Then a handwritten confession appears on a worksheet, leaving Mayama convinced there must be some mistake. There isn’t. Asamiya’s feelings are very much for him, and he’s more than ready to make sure Mayama knows it.

After Moving Seats, the Boy Behind Me Has a Crush on Me doesn’t waste any time diving into the story, immediately bringing Mayama and Asamiya together before quickly revealing Asamiya’s feelings. Rather than slow burn its way toward a confession, the series lays those feelings bare from the beginning and spends much of its time exploring Mayama’s insecurities instead.

I’ll admit that Mayama constantly putting himself down can get a little frustrating at times. He simply can’t understand why someone as popular and attractive as Asamiya would be interested in him, no matter how clearly Asamiya expresses himself. But before that insecurity becomes too much, episode two offers a glimpse into Mayama’s past that makes his inability to believe he’s good enough for Asamiya much easier to understand.

And that leaves Asamiya with a surprisingly difficult road ahead of him.

Not because he needs to make Mayama feel the same way, but because before Mayama can truly accept Asamiya’s feelings, he first has to learn to accept himself.

That’s what has me most invested after these opening episodes. Beneath the cute classroom moments and Asamiya’s relentless affection is a story about how difficult it can be to believe someone sees something lovable in you when you haven’t learned how to see it yourself.

As someone who spent much of my youth feeling inept compared to the people around me, I’m rooting for Mayama. I want to see him discover that he doesn’t have to understand why Asamiya chose him to believe that those feelings are real.

Sometimes being loved isn’t about figuring out why. It’s about learning to believe you deserve to be.

For a series about accepting yourself while also falling in love, check out After Moving Seats, the Boy Behind Me Has a Crush on Me, now streaming on GagaOOLala.

Rating- 4 out of 5